HONOR YOUR PARENTS

Principle number 5, HONOR YOUR PARENTS

In today’s view of the home and parenting it is almost offensive to say what is stated above. The actual honoring of the parental position of the home is more in theory than in practicality today. In an age of questioning authority, personal entitlement and downright selfish rebellion the parental role has been disavowed and often shoved to a Tuesday night sitcom in which it also gets little praise.

Now I know I am being harsh, but my harshness does not come from being a victim thus I am trying to find healing by spewing my own venom, but from a hurt/healed background and from the heart of a father. I am privilege to raise two grand, spectacular children and so I have seen it from both sides. The side of the child and the side of the parent.

Come to think if it, I bet you have as well. I know all of you where a child at one point and most of you grew up to be a parent or at least have dealt with children in your life. So we have our good stories, our bad stories and the ones that we remember when we crack open the scrapbook. Maybe those stories come from a good family environment and so you don’t struggle with this one as much. But maybe those stories come from dads that were never present or abusive. Maybe they come from moms that could not or would not care for you even strung out on their own pain. So you struggle with this idea, even to the point of not reading past my first line.

“No, I could never honor that person….what they did to me was so disgusting that the best I could hope for is to tolerate them!” Let me say that I am sorry if you have gone through this much pain and rejection. Let me also say that Jesus is the same yesterday, today and He will be tomorrow. He is trustworthy, loving, and will remain in your life past all human failure! Trust in Him and release your pain today, you won’t regret it! But also don’t be fooled that your broken home was the reason why you did not honor your parents, I have known many a good home in which the “sliver-spoon” children failed to honor their parents even though their parents did little to deserve such disrespect. Additionally I have known people that come from those broken homes that have found a place of healing and a place of honor for their parents that dishonored them.

How, how does one start this process? To answer the question, let me first celebrate with you because if you genuinely asked the question you have already taken your first step. AWESOME!

The next step it to look at yourself and stop blaming them for your life. That’s victimization and it’s the opposite of honor. It will cause you to be weak in mind and in spirit and will keep you from admission of what you have done. Yep, I said it, somewhere in the process you played a role in the dishonor. I don’t know what or how much but healing and honor can’t fill the same place as unforgiveness and bitterness. You have one or the other, you are either coming out of one, or going into the other. The choice is up to you based on what you are willing to admit. And that is honestly where it starts. I know those words are hard to hear because of the pain you carry and the violations that may still exist to this day, but it has to happen for you to get to a place of honor with your parents.

It will get easier with God’s help, which is the second step, you need God’s help with this one! You will need His forgiveness and tenderness to infuse the process. He is a very tender God that will right every wrong done on planet earth. Hear this Scripture:

“A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out, till he leads justice to victory.” (Matthew 12:20)

So while you wrestle with memories and experiences from your painful past or present and choose to lay your hurt and pain at the feet of Jesus you will find strength in the middle of weakness and comfort in the middle of pain. Remember that God tells us in the 5th commandment that doing so will lead to a long life. It includes prosperity, blessing and happiness. It’s the first commandment that comes with a promise! Think about that, it’s so important and God knows it can be so difficult that He gives you a promise to get going.

When you follow God and His principles of life they never fail you, you will always be blessed as a result. Let me pray with you….

“Heavenly Father, I pray today with my friends here that carry dishonor for their parents because of the pain that has been caused from poor parenting. I pray that each of them will first put their pain in your hands today and stop holding on to it and stop wasting energy trying to make their parents pay for their mistakes. Instead I pray with the same passion they would surrender those experiences to you and receive healing. I pray they would have the courage to ask for forgiveness in the areas that you reveal they are also played a part in dishonor. I pray for their parents that they would come to know you Jesus and be saved and renewed. May your precious love flood over them today and show them your ways are right and true. May they apply them wholeheartily without reservation and live a long life. In Jesus Name—amen”

One last statement before I close this evotional. Boundaries with people are very important. You can still honor your parents but keep them to the boundaries you have established, notice I did not say walls! Boundaries define where and how the relationship will work, those are for each human being regardless of age. So you can honor them, not for what they do or have done, but simply because God choose them to bring you into the world.